The Wryno Party

HerImperialHighness proclaims that, henceforth, the Ralph Goodale Budget, then the Jack Layton Budget, shall now and forever be known as the Belinda Budget. I am sure the Hon. Belinda Stronach will forgive me for the lack of formality in view of the alliteration afforded by the use of her given name. As reported at www.bloc-harper.com, the Hon. Belinda Stronach was the saviour of Canada's future, at least for a little while.

All is not secure, however. I would alert all loyal Canadians (each and every Liberal one of us) to pay close attention to the evils that are diagrammed at www.bloc-harper.com/blocharper/task.htm. As you can see, both Quebec and the Western provinces need to be protected from the dangers that are Harper & company. Harper intends to transfer unprecendented levels of power, authority and control to all provinces and territories. Why, such powers have not been seen at the provincial level since before the Right Hon. Pierre Trudeau, may he rest in Liberal pieces peace. As spelled out at the website, the logical end is: provinces that share cultural and economic interests will decide they would be better off separate from Canada! That would mean a dismantling of the Canada that we know and love! That would mean people in the remaining portions would be responsible for funding their own problem solving actions - even if the remaining portions lack the finances to fund the social responses to global problems! How can we allow this to happen?

A better question, a smarter question: How can we prevent this from happening? 1. We must obfuscate the information. People must not be allowed to communicate in a single, understandable language. That way, we cannot be accused of withholding information - we can honestly say that people just didn't take the time to learn the language we're using to express the information. 2. Pass Orders-in-Council in secret, and ram legislation through with no time for debate or questions, to ensure power stays in Ottawa and out of the provincial realms. 3. Spend, spend, spend - keep Quebec in Canada - the western areas are too far away to notice what's going on, but we need Hull in Canada! 4. Promote non-English education and employment - most of the westerners speak English, so - let's stick with French as the new language of choice - that should keep Quebec happy and the westerners confused. 5. Hide the costs of language obsfucation through all levels of government. 6. Should anyone question or criticize our actions, make it clear that the person is either insane (and therefore in need of treatment) or an extremist (and therefore in need of treatment) and in either case, should be ignored. Make it clear that a chimpanzee is more qualified to comment on government policy than anyone who dares to question government policy. 7. Tax the west more heavily. If they had to work more hours, they would be more tired, and therefore less able to complain or even find things about which to complain. The west is supposed to provide raw materials (including cash) to eastern Canada anyways; that was the arrangement; if they don't like it, they can move out east - sorry, just a little bit of levity in an otherwise horrendously serious sitiation.

There you have it - a simple seven-point plan to keep Quebec and the west quiet. And all because the Hon. Belinda Stronach was able to keep the country alive at its darkest hour!